Snot

What a glorious weekend! After months of gloom and cold, spring is on our doorstep and we have sunny, blue skies and temperatures climbing over the 20 degree mark. A perfect time for long walks by the river, visits to the zoo and generally soaking up the sunshine.

And am I doing any of this?

NO! I am at home dealing with SNOT!

Who would have thought that I could get through the entire winter without so much as a sniffle, fending off the diseased (of whom there have been legion) with no ill effects, just to succumb at the last minute to that scourge of mankind - the cold in the head.

A slight, scratchy 'ahem' thing on Friday had, by Saturday morning, turned into sore throat, swollen glands and hacking cough. So much for plans made with the Bestie and Baby Angel to enjoy the outdoors in the morning before sharing a delicious lunch with the Parental Body in the afternoon. No - it was straight to the couch, do not pass go, do not collect $200 (except for visit to chemist to get cold and flu tablets and visit to shop to get chocolate, they being the necessities of the sick bed).

By this morning, of course, all of the above symptoms had trasmuted into just one thing - snot. Oh, the throat is still a bit sore and the cough continues, but these have paled into insignificance when compared to the snot factory my nose has become. And why is it so? We have all been told that the body is a wondrous and sophisticated thing, capable of all manner of marvels - so why is it that when you're already feeling crook it heaps insult upon injury and decides that breathing through the nose has just become an optional extra?

Of course there are varying degrees of snot. The DIVA has, from time to time, demonstrated 'opera snot' which is of a type and quality to inspire awe amongst us mere mortals. Something to do with nasal resonators ... Kiddies seem to have snotty noses 100% of the time which worries them far less than it worries anyone else (particularly their poor mother's who have to wash their sleeves!). But there's something particularly depressing about 'cold in the head' snot which follows its inevitable path - from slow drip in manner of leaking tap through to something that has the consistency of semi-dried cement and is equally difficult to get rid of.

Oh - and those aloe vera tissues? Well, they are an improvement, but we all know that by day 5 even gossamer would take on the texture of course sand-paper ...

So the birds are singing, the sun is shining, and I'm going back to my couch. Grrrr...